The stars (Sirius, the dog star in the constellation Canis Major.........serious, we're not) that perhaps weave our fate have finally aligned and precipitated the next aspect of this (not so) great adventure of the good ship "Dog". This event has been coming for the past 8 months and was as inevitable as those aforementioned celestial arrangements. Ben has decided to continue on with the rest of his life. He was here only temporarily while he thought things out. What has he learned? Nothing sucks as bad as this and he can do a lot better. It's about the adventure of the unknown, not slogging through epoxy and heartbreak pursuing another's dream that has become tarnished around the edges. He was dragged into the quagmire with the same hope I had, that it would take a year or two. His help was immeasurable. His absence missed.
He has much to do. He has to be Ben again, grist ground in the mill of time reinvented as baked goods . This entails the rebuilding of his persona: car, wardrobe, job, life. He has plenty of support, a place to go, shelter, and less stress. He has money for the transition and a clean slate on which to transcribe his own adventure. He decided the best tack to take was to purchase a Texas car, lower on rust than an Ohio car. He spent days car shopping. As we all know, you gotta kiss a lot of toads before you find your prince. This can bum one out, as most toads around here are 50+ miles away and the toad he probably will buy, 5 hours away by car. Ah, Texas: long distance toads down long distance roads. Two weeks of interweb perusal. People that omit the removal of advertisements, misrepresentation of vehicles by smarmy car dealerships, salesmen, unencumbered by ability to listen to you, presenting you with a vehicle that is twice as much as you want to spend, that think the hard sell will get you to buy. Trips of 40, 150, 40 miles one way only to find dashed hopes. Then there was the loan, applied for several times jumping through one hoop after another to get the process completed. For a brief time, he will be free of all encumbrances, driving across the country in a nice car with no cares, not thinking of anything but his next endeavor. It's about all the freedom anyone gets before we build a new set of cages. Sometime this week he will depart.
I push on though I know not why. Melancholia is my new frenemy. It is always the same formula: keep moving, think less, keep things light, don't cry, don't be sad.